Sunday, March 22, 2009

Old Sympathy letters...and hidden emotions

The last few days I have been very out of touch with my feelings..just kind of walking in a haze trying to get things done and not really connecting to my heart.

There are good reasons for it..the show must go on..and so on..I have work to do..pressures with bills etc...but these months i wanted to keep close to these emotions  and not be like this...and i found myself drawing, painting, sewing, anything just to get away from emotions.

It is easier that way..but not very productive.
So i began to list on ebay..my other life...and found a large grouping of old letters. I have a lot of random things i need to get  out of my home and this is one of them....so i began to read them..and they were all sympathy notes...and letters from 1920...but the strange thing..maybe because i am grieving, maybe because this is a different time..i really enjoyed reading them..i wanted to keep the grouping...just because the writing was so beautiful....

and then i realized...mmmmm...not connecting with my heart. so i listened to music and i cried.
also actually...and it was good.

then i called one of my mom's friends daughters...she was a gal who lost her mom only weeks before i lost mine. i figured we should be at the same place. 

we were...and i was relieved....do you feel kind of ditzy i said??spacey??yes, she said...
and so on....we found out that in the grieving process...we could really relate....

we are having lunch next week..
catherine

No comments:

Post a Comment